An attempt at slam poetry: I feel like a Child

The first time you took my hand, 

I knew the world would spin forward now. 

I could stop backpedaling through the dark shadows of my mind and

just breathe

I knew I had found someone worthy of "best friend". 

I mean that in the way that you are the best person 

of all the people I know

of all the friends that I have

you are the best prize in my collection of hearts. 

I won the day I met you. 

If I could write a poem every day, all of them would be about you

because I know you always have time to read them. 

When you took my hand, my head stopped. 

All the thoughts from the years of anxiety and depression

vanished like a tidal wave washing away the sand. 

You found my lost child and told her the monsters were gone

shining your light on all the broken mirrors shattered by loved ones past

I could never get you out of my mind. 

My brain and my heart have always been connected, 

so since I let you hold onto my heart I've been captive. 

However my emotions are still childlike

when I don't get to see you, I feel like I can't remember you

I want to remember everything about you

The way you hold your weight when you walk in a room

The way you play music to fill the silence

The way you side smile when you're truly happy. 

The longer we're apart, the more my heart feels like it's coming back to me. 

I don't want it anymore. 

When I don't get to see you, I feel like my skin is empty. 

There's no one to lean on me while watching movies

There's no one to hit when they're making fun of me. 

There's no one to hold onto when my trigger wires are cut. 

The longer we're apart the more distance of time keeps me from you. 

I can't wait anymore. 

I know I'm not losing you, but lending you out like a library book

there's always the potential of no return. 

I tell myself, "I'm an adult", but why is it when you have to make a choice

my 4 year old heart wants to sit in the corner or in the middle of a parking lot

and pout and cry and scream "Pick me!

I was here first!"

How much dust must collect on my heart before you'll pick it up again?

I love you

and I will wait. 

No matter how long it takes.

My world is still spinning forward. 

My hand is still open for you to take.

Copyright: August 16, 2013